Book lovers, your advice is needed

Dear avid-reading friends, I need your help :)

I need some inspiration for a decorating a wall in my house. I want to put beautiful/nice/funny/inspirational quotes/fragments from books or stories up there. Can you share your favorite book fragments with me? :)

 

Why did they leave such an impression?

Missing the loneliness

If there is one thing that I miss about my student life, it's the loneliness. The late nights where I would feel rather sorry for myself for being alone, for having a boyfriend far away. Those were the nights where I would put on some sad music, sip on a glass of wine and would just write. I was able to let out my creativity, to put things into perspective, to feel.

I was able to skip a few hours of sleep, just because I was in an emotional, nostalgic mood and fligh high on the fever of exhaustion the next day. I honestly terrifyingly miss it, those nights where I would read old entries scribbled down in messy notebooks. Where I would spend the night writing and talking online to my best friend overseas. When I was counting down the days until I would not have to live them anymore, when life would finally become normal, even though I was secretly enjoying it.

These days, I am restless, and unlike the times when I was a student and would have plenty of nights on my own, working on some kind of project, I cannot retreat as easily as I could then. I spend my evenings watching some mindless tv show, listen to Jeroen's worries of the day and finding it 11 o'clock before I have put any of my wishes into practice.

It is true, I have my own room now, so I can withdraw if I need to, like I have done at the moment. It just comes at a heavy price. It is not really socially acceptable and it does not do your relationship much good if you just withdraw into your own room after a long day at work, and stay there until deep in the night. Living together with someone you love has endless advantages but it really does come at a price. It is that of your individuality, your creativity and I have yet to find a way around that.

I haven't read a good book in ages. I haven't had the time (or money) to go and look for the ones I still have on my reading list. I haven't written since I quit nano. It doesn't feel good.

I am still struggling. I love my job and I want to give it all my energy to develop in it, but I know I am a writer at heart and that I need to continue to write to keep me sane, to stop my mind from repeating every thought again and again through the night. When I feel I cannot do that, I shut down, not professionnaly, but definitely emotionally. Or I start overreacting to the smallest things.

Very few people seem to realize how much I need these little secluded hours. Even now I already feel rushed because I know that if I stay in here for too long, Jeroen will start to feel all sorry for himself that I do not pay attention to him. And he is right, I haven't been a really good girlfriend to him in ages. I still love him, but I really need some me-time but I haven't been giving him a lot of attention lately. And I feel bad for it. I just wish I could be different, but maybe I am just not meant to live together with someone.

I miss missing him, to count down the nights to when I would be able to see him again, sleep in his arms. Now I do that every night. It is warm and comfortable, but it has also become common. I do not have the urge or opportunity to prepare a romantic evening because he is always home before I am and it is just not special anymore.

I guess I will just have to get used to living like this, to find my own way in allocating me some time with my laptop or a piece of paper, or a good book. At the same time I need to try and find a way for our lives not to become boring and standard. I am just totally at loss of how I am going to do that.

The crossroads

Life is a journey through the twilight, with crossroads at every corner. Some will just lead you onto a similar way as you had been following before, others will change the direction of your life forever.

Two months ago, I bought a house. It is probably the biggest decision of my life and I took it in quite a short amount of time. I will get the keys on Monday and have eagerly been counting down the days ever since I decided to make an offer for it (I have even made a calendar like Harry did for Hogwarts). At the time, I shortly weighed all the options and saw it as the best way forward. I still do; but now that it is coming closer, I am starting to have cold feet.

The implications are huge, I am responsible to earn a steady income in order to keep it. I have to sign a cohabitation agreement with my boyfriend so he can inherit the house if I die. I have to make up my will so that in case I die, and my boyfriend dies 3 minutes later, the house will go to my parents. To be honest... that freaked me out a little.

Me and J. (my boyfriend) have been together for over 6 years and have lived together for more than a year. His unpredictability and his challenging character have always drawn me to him. For some reason, I gravitate towards weird and complicated people. They are great characters to study, I would not be able to live and love a 'normal' person. We have been very happy together but still, is it really a smart idea to sign a cohabitation agreement together? 

In the end I am sure it is, I have always had cold feet on the eve of a large change. I have always managed fine. For me, it is still the best option and my heart tells me it's right.

As a writer, I love to review these internal struggles. Why do I feel this way? Why do I have these doubts? It allows me to learn more about my own character. At the same time, I feel I can understand more about the ways of the human mind, which has always been a great source of inspiration for my writing. I love to follow my character's spiritual journey. I linger on the crossroads, to see what it does to their feelings and how ultimately, it makes them grow. I make them doubt, so in the end they can become stronger.

If you are a writer, what are your ways to make your characters grow? Do you like to write crossroads? How important are they to your story?

Once upon a time...

...there was a young woman who liked to tell stories, but mainly told them to herself because she was afraid no one wanted to listen to them. She told stories about the ways of the world, about young people living in that world and the confusing battles they fight. This young woman thought writing was nice as a hobby, when there was time, but other than that she left her inner voice unused. She hardly let anyone hear her stories, there are so many stories in the world to tell... She had other talents and obligations to focus on like getting her life started, an exciting job, family, and most of all a challenging boyfriend whom she loves more than her life.

This young woman is me. There are three huge pillars in my life that I try to balance the best I can. Stories, love and science, not necessarily in that other. With stories I associate everything from reading to writing and plotting. I love reading, and since last year I have picked up on writing once more. I started writing again during National Novel Writing Month last year and recently finished the first draft of the novel I started then. Love, I guess, basically speaks for itself. The last one,  science, is the final big part of my life. I love doing research (I work for a consultancy company in the pharmaceutical industry) and have academic discussions and I honestly cannot live without constantly learning new things. The world is such a complex place, I do not believe a human has ever learned enough about it to be satisfied.

As these three pillars are so different, I find it difficult to put all the things together at times. However, I have decided it is time to use my story telling voice more often and find out what it's worth. So this blog is step one of using it and balancing the stories with the other pillars of my life

 I have spend the pasts months reading up on other people's blogs about writing, and I am very grateful for their insights. It has encouraged me to start my own and share my stories about life. I have discovered, a long time ago, that the internet is a great place to share stories and to develop new insights, and also to meet new friends. 

So dear reader, I humbly thank you for visiting my blog. My first question to you is, how do you manage the pillars of your life? Do you have any tips to share to show more of your inner story teller? How do keep yourself from getting caught up too much in only one of the pillars?